the left half of my collar bone is bent forwards and i can never get my shoulder in a comfortable position. now the same thing is happening to the right side. who else is fucked up?

i've been walking on my toes for my entire life because of tight achilles tendons...my legs are over developed and it hurts like hell to stretch them

I broke my toe and it didn't heal right, and it re-breaks every few weeks and makes me limp

i am flat-footed, knock-kneed, have dislocated my right knee 3 times, dislocated my left knee 1 time, both of them crack and make gross noises when walking on stairs, my shoulder blades protrude much farther backwards than they should, i have a huge head and ape-like arms, i have hitch-hiker's thumb (i.e. the top half bends backwards with no help of my other fingers to form a 90 degree angle), all of my fingers are double-jointed (so i can make them dance in wave-like movements and have "zombie fingers"), and i think that's just about it.

I have fat all over my body. It's weeeeeird.

I am devastatingly handsome.

I have a huge black penis.

my toe:

Dude....ew.

pam said:

that's not as gross as your big black cock. that thing's all twisted and gnarled and hurts when it's going in your...ear?

ok what the FUCK happened to your foot

I broke my arm as a kid (compound fracture) and that with all my typing and photography, I have to watch my wrists for the nerve damage.

The right side of my chest is indented and the left is normal. My left ear sticks out a little more. My back definitely isn't straight. Nose isn't straight. Probably more. Well, at least my orientation is straight.

I look like a terrorist.

carina thinks its a deformity that I can go with out food easily for days and days. a couple years ago I wanted to go a week, but she made me stop after 5 days. I must have been muslim.

Shannon nli said:

Niccolai, was that from what happened like over a month ago? Looks pretty gross.

Shannon nli said:

that's my deformity as well. :(

the_reverend said:

I can do that if I have enough beer.

rich and I have the same deformity as charlie brown's xmas tree.

i have pulminary stinosis, and had three open-heart surgeries, beat that!

I have extra cartilage just above and to the side of my right knee.

Yea, thats my toe. it's ugly.

the_reverend said:

that's nothin...i used to have to do that when i was on the "I'm too poor to eat" diet

as far as actual deformities...none that i can think of. i have 2 nasty scars on my leg from my ankle surgery and sometimes it's a little sore, but nothing i'd call "deformed"

I have Kartageners Syndrome.

The only 'deformation' really is the fact that all of my internal organs are reversed. Yes, I'm serious.

he's serious.

one of my feet is slightly bigger than the other...

i can dislocate lots of things on my body. shoulders, knees, fingers, etc. i also have dimples. and aspergers syndrome. and a chronic inability to keep my bodily waste away from those i dislike.

hahah

Jay, I could have told you there are no cameras at GC. How do you think I stole so much?

how the fuck did they know it was me then?

i was wondering how they didnt see me snorting rails off the repair desk.

One of my ears is slightly further forward than the other.
I have a tremor.
One of my collar bones has a weird protrusion on it. It's kind of hard to describe without seeing it.
When I was born the circlular muscle that is directly before my stomch (forget what it's called) was so small that I couldn't swallow anything so it had to be cut open and then stitched up again.

oh yea thats right, i shake like a fucking vibrator too. ask anyone.

I have one shoulder higher than the other. One leg is slightly longer than the other. The top of my sacrum (iliac crest) is malformed and is bigger than the other side because it thinks its a vertabrae which caused a herniation in my lumbar spine which in turn led to my back surgery. The muscles in my ass that hold my hip and pelvis in place are too short which cause me to occasionally walk like a pimp. And it hurts like the dickens.

Got a massive scar that runs across the entire top right side of my head. Didn't heal entirely right, so it still hurts semi-often even 11 years after the injury.

Index fingers are ever so slightly crooked, I'd imagine from video games.

I can kinda dislocate my left shoulder.

my joints sound like cement mixers

my left eye and cheek don't have as much movement as my right side after a bout with paralysis

i have a small dent on the ride side of the bridge of my nose

my jaw is misaligned by a couple millimeters

mOe said:

thats the same with me but my left foot only i have to wear a brace but i never do.

I've never broken a bone or needed to go to the ER in my life. Plus, I've healed up wounds that most peope swore needed stitches and only get sick once a year (I'm up to 18 months and counting since last time)

my hog...

I have a bump on the back of my head, it's this bony knob on the back of my skull. You can't see it, if I shaved my head bald you might see it but if you felt the back of my head you would definitely feel it.

I also have two small bumps - one in each of my temples that my doctor said were cysts. He told me not to worry about them unless they get bigger, and they never have, and I've had them for maybe 10 years or so. You can't see these either but you can feel them.

On my right thumb, I've recently developed a nasty callous. I'm guessing it started from using my thumb to pluck my guitar strings when I tune it, but over the past few months its gotten bigger, and now its really dry and cracked and can be painful and irritating. I've tried slicing it off, but the skin underneath is so sensitive it stings like a motherfucker as soon as the blade cuts through it.

I guess that's about it for me.

Agrippa said:

Because they know you're a fucking dirt bag, it's not rocket science.

<3

Kinslayer said:

Does that cause you problems? Cause if not, that's actually kinda cool.

"I broke my arm once"
"Yeah? My fucking insides are reversed."
"Wow"

Ryan_M said:

thats syphillis chief,better get checked out

Ryan_M said:

thats syphillis chief,better get checked out

anonymous said:

I don't think so.

Nah nah none of you get a place in my futuristic utopia populated by a super-human race.

I have cysts under my skin that piss me off. mostly around my ribs and forearms.
the hurt when you touch them and as I put on more muscles they stick out. I want them cut out, but then I would have a bunch of scars.

Mine is obvious ha ha

your eyes spin around your face uncontrollably?

dreadkill said:

You weren't complaining last night.

sacreligion said:

See I told you..

mOe said:

You should get those botulinum toxin shots. Is that a muscle dystonia thing?

I have scoliosis and a shitty immune system.

i have this terrible genetic affliction where i get more and more handsomer every single day.

the_reverend said:

i have similar issues in my ears and on various parts of my right arm. i also have a goof finger, my right pinky finger is bent at a 90 degree angle.

i have a penis on my arm.

ya this def beats everyone

I have 2 gross scars (one of my knee and one on my forearm). They're not as noticable as they used to be but they're kind of gross up close. I was in a car accident the summer before 7th grade where my whole family flipped over 3 times in a mini-van. Interestingly enough, my brother, who was hanging out the window by the end of the 3rd roll and was almost crushed to death, was the only one without injury.

I've also got a decent sized scar on my chin from a Sworn Enemy show like 5 years ago. Definetly should have gotten stitches for that one.

I have a crooked left arm due to a spiral fracture I received due to a badly lost arm-wrestling match.

I broke my nose years ago, and it's been slightly crooked ever since.

I'm also impossibly scrawny, and like Aaron, can go days without food.

i constantly see a black dot (floater). it's pretty fucking annoying. it started last winter. probably got a TUMA!

EEEEZ NOT A TOOOOMAH!

Mess said:

Is that Britney Spears?

Mess said:

Yep, got one of those.

sinistas said:

seriously? they fucking suck. i went to the docs probably 5 times and all they say is it should go away soon. and then another said it might go away or i could have it until i die? wtf is that?

Mess said:

you might have glaucoma. i have glaucoma. you should get that checked out

Granny_Monster said:

me too :(

i have a huge cock...thats my deformity. Some people would thing its a blessing...but you've obviously never tried to fuck a 14 year old girl with one.

I have Epilepsy and because of it I have memory loss and shit.

SteveOTB said:

Does the epilepsy cause you to forget the difference between a physical deformity and a neurological disorder?

BobNOMAAMRooney said:

Ahh I guess you're right. But it does have to do with my brain so I would think it's physical as well.

oh yeah, and tedonitis in both wrists from fappn and what not

i got a scar on my hand from slicing it with an x-acto knife i also have a scar on my head from when it was split open by a bottle..not to mention the fact i cant sit comfortably for more than an hour since i fell off of a roof

oh yeah and i'm also freakishly tall.

all the males on my mom's side of the family have been born with hernias, and i got blessed with one of those right above the ol' italian stallion (heyo!), removed a few weeks after birth i guess. so i have 2 scars, 1 about 4 inches and one about 2 inches above my junk. good stuff.

Ryan_M said:

I've got the Kirk Hammet callus on the side of my right hand from palm muting. Catching a string in it hurts like eight bitches on a bitchboat.

i have a fucked up collarbone from a botched mountain bike jump that makes my shoulder click whenever i apply force in certain ranges of motion, (painting ceilings for example, is painful as hell)
also a ganglion cyst on my left wrist from lifting weights like an idiot when i was younger, it only really swells up and inhibits motion when theres humid or stormy weather
i had a bout with epilepsy when i was 12 or so but the doctors said it was a passing thing and i havent had another seizure sinucneoubn;alfoni/eh
gpj
rJROMEAOMGOPETJ'ALH;<m?D.

mark, I was born wirh a hernia too. 2 scars "woohoo!"

when I broke my arm, both bones broke and I have a scar from where the bone came out to say "oh helloz!"

i haven't broken any bones yet (that i know of). i have a feeling my nose has been broken a couple times but never did anything about it. i know i have a deviated septum.

the_reverend said:

hooray for crotch scars!

My back is all fucked up. I have had 2 surgeries on the same spot. A really bad herniated disc. The last surgery just a few months ago. It sucks bad.

INFECT said:

I had something like that in middle school, so yeah, around 12. Haven't had a seizure in ages, but I'm always really shakey.

INFECT said:

HAHAHAHA

pam said:

Well one of the symptoms is 'immotile cilia syndrome" which means my cilia don't work 100% so I do have athsmatic like symptoms from time to time but nothing serious. I played soccer my whole life including in college and it never deterred me...

It's one in 65,000 people that have it and I have a rare, 'perfect' reversal of internal organs so I have MUCH less problems than most others born with it...it's genetic.

I'm supposed to wear a medical bracelet that says I have it incase I need emergency care at some point like in a car accident and the doctors dont know everything is backwards; it's a mirror image of 'normal' internal organs...

whoa

That's so bizarre!!! I'm glad you don't have any serious complications.

Me too...

I used to think I was slick and funny in grade school saying the pledge of allegiance with my hand over my heart on the right, hahah

i have a gruesome looking scar on my wrist from when i accidentally smashed by hand through a glass window.. sliced all the tendons amd muscles inside... never healed right. can barely use it to watch dishes.. the only bitch i have about it is it interferes with playing my guitar