Lil Wayne wanted (DC-MD-VA)
Reply to: gigs-w3a3t-1218083689@craigslist.org
Date: 2009-06-12, 12:27PM EDT

My son is turning 16 and really wanted Lil Wayne to perform for his birthday gala. Unfortunately his schedule will not permit him to make it. I need a Lil Wayne impersonator desperately.

Here is the kicker my son is blind so you do not need to look like the rapper just sound like him. I understand he grunts and mumbles a lot. I don’t care if you are 67 and Jewish if you can sing the songs you’re hired. Money is not an issue. Name your price. Interested individuals please let me know your rap experience, video of you performing as Lil Wayne would be better. If that is not feasible we can arrange for a live audition.

Serious inquiries only, this is very important to my family. Young Money Baby!

* Location: DC-MD-VA
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
* Compensation: Negotiable

PostingID: 1218083689

http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/doc/tlg/1218083689.html in case anyone is interested.

ya deeg?

wow lol

Is the government calling me a loser?

yes. yes it is.

the main point to this ad is, why is the mother letting her children listen to Lil Wayne?

Who the fuck is Lil Wayne? (This question is rhetorical -- I'm pretty sure I don't want to know).

well i do a great lil' wheezy.

F- on everything except the "RAPE" buckle.

rofl

despite being rhetorical, i'm going to answer anyways.

just another useless pile of shit who got rich and famous doing nothing but being a useless pile of shit.

definitely not making fun of this enough people.

it almost seems pointless to do so.

Uh...Im so Dipset- Dipsouth Baby,
If you don't like it nigga, Fuck You wit a AIDS dick,
I hope you die 30 times, nigga murder moms,
No fast talk, Im on that syrup, im on that turtle time
If Killa say a Nigga Dead, then a Nigga Dead
If Stunna say a Nigga Dead, then a Nigga Dead
VIP-We be them niggas bangin in the red,
Dont drink cristal no more, just pour it on white bitches heads

Rape buckle FTW

bitch I'm paid, thats all I gotta say
can't see my lil nigga, the money in the way
and im, I'm sittin high, a gansta ride blades
if you aint gone ride fly than you might as well hate
shit I gotta eat... even though I ate
it aint my birthday but I got my name on my cake
believe that, if ya mans wanna play
imma fuck around and put that boy brains on the table
so pick 'em up, pop 'em let 'em lay
where I'm from we see a fuckin dead body everyday
thats, uptown, throwin stuff at 'em
niggaz talk about me I'm throwin shots back at 'em
bitch I'm a pipe, and she like a crack attic
and she saw me cookin EGGS and she though I was back at it
I grab the keys, hoe I gotta go
I got my motorcycle jacket and my motorcycle loafs

"bitch i'm a pipe, and she like a crack attic"

die. just die and rid us of your stupidity.

hahaha awesome

Best part is he has FEAR GOD tattooed on his eyelids. You fear what you don't know I guess.

I don't even know how to make fun of him, I just pretend he doesn't exist.

the thing that comes to mind whenever I see him is what he'll be like at age 80.

I just lol and lol. No thinking involved.

i bet bob doesn't love this music.

Women probably ask him NOT to eat their bojinas.

though he is constantly asked to eat Bovainas.

He took a Bovaload to the grill and ended up bedazzled.

It is true that I probably don't love this music, but gotta say I don't think I've actually heard his music. I do have a strange attraction to bad music...

IT'S NOT MUSIC
THERE IS A LOT OF RAP WORTH LISTENING TO
THIS IS NOT IT
DO NOT LOVE IT
DO NOT PASS GO
DO NOT COLLECT PLATINUM GRILL

Whenever I hear this shit, I listen to it like I would a comedy album.

I'm sure I've heard him (alot of my best friends are fans of whatever is on the radio, no matter what it is), and if I have, I didn't know it was him....

with that said, I've heard many people in the media proclaim him as some sort of Rap God...I'll take Grandmaster Flash, the Sugarhill Gang, Dr. Dre, Public Enemy, etc. over him 1000000% of the time

that's not music....it's NIGGA NOISE

I AM A ROBOT AND THIS ROBOT IS ON OVERLOAD

I am familiar with his "music", and it's exactly what you would expect it to be... I do get a kick outta lil wayne though.. in EVERY one of his interviews he feels the need to tell the world that his favorite drink is "syzurp", Which is Codeine cough syrup mixed with vodka and juice... dudes just another junkie. One so tragically retarded that the world loves watching him live.

One time for me, one time for the DJ
He be Khaled, I be Lil' Weezy
Baby if you ask me if you're nasty
Creative gifted bastard
Spit sporadic
I'm so diplomatic democratic
Touch it, Bring it, Push it systematic
Damn right I kissed my daddy
I think they pissed at how rich my daddy is
And I'm his kid I stunt with my daddy
Call Mrs. Lee, she's with my daddy
So diss me and dont diss my daddy
Cause who was there when no one wasn't? Just my daddy
Who was there when I needed money? Just my daddy
So who'll be there when I see the money? Just my daddy
Who said that I be the one?
Just my daddy!
Hello Hip Hop I'm home,
Its Your Daddy
When I say D's, I don't mean the caddy I mean 'deez nuts'
Akon's and Khaleds, Rick Ross, TIP, Stunna and Fat Joe
And I can't, can't, can't forget Brisco
& Yeah I done squashed the bullshit it's rizo
It's a bakery here just trying to get dough
Shout to my Dreads, my Haitians and Chicos
You're lookin for me hoe?
I'm in the 3-0...Five,
I'm the best rapper alive
Homeboy got a mind, that a map couldnt find
Homeboy got a 9, that a cop couldnt find
I could get to it even if I was blind
Scary movie be screaming when I rhyme
I'ma 'King' you can ask 'Steven' if I'm lying
I'ma Prince too demanding like my mom
Too bold too cold like wet Sa-lam-Me!
Me! It's all about me!
If a girl gotta voice then she talking about me!
He say, she say, I say me!
Will be in the M.I.A. me!
With me! And T! And Big Ronnie!
And the homie Street probably somewhere on the beach
And Tez and E probably somewhere in the jeep
And Marl in the Phantom with Mr. G
And me! Me! It's all about me!
Play with me and it's all out beef
Beef! Yes! Chest! Feet!,
Tag! Bag! Blood! Sheets!
Yikes! Yeeks! Great! Scott!
Storch! Can I borrow your yacht?
Watch me and my click go all out
Like the ball in the stands we balls out
Boy I don't know what y'all 'bout
But I just spit like a dog mouth
Pink ice just looking like a hog mouth
VRRRMMM ...I had to bring the hog out
Light dem trees bring the log out
Everyday Christmas I'm egged nogged out
& Hip Hop Is My New Bought House
My flow just grew legs and walked out

More profit from the destruction of the English language. Let's just hope this retard gets fatally shot -- though unfortunately that would make him even more of an icon for the retarded (ie, Tupac).

sorry folks, but this is lol.

Bitch you can eat these pills and chill and tell me all about em,
Hold up my heart is knockin,
Don't worry water stops it,
Hold up your mouth is dry,
Don't worry water mops it,
I got a great idea,
We should have sex,
Bitch I'm like Dante Hall,
I just throw up the X,
My dick be still hard,
I be so up for next,
That's when you slip up and fuck around, and fuck ya ex,
That be that bullshit,
But it's the fuckin best!,
I get her to pop a pill,
And come and fuck the set!,
And I fuckin rep

I think it says bape which might be a clothing company or something.

I would do the shit out of this if I could rap/get paid.

no, that definitely says "RAPE"

actually I think Eli is right...notice the gaps in the bottom of A and in between P and E....the R would have the same gap....I think that's a B

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Bathing_Ape

LOL at clothing label.

hahaha...ok, I know about Bape. It just seriously looks like Rape from afar.

I can't believe it's short for A Bathing Ape.

LOL @ Surprise racism.

Surprise racism > Rape? You decide...

i nominate MSD for this special moment in a young child's life

I'm surprised it took you guys that long to notice it said "BAPE" and not "RAPE". See what you wanna see.

and he misspelled rape? wtf!