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returntothepit >> discuss >> need to pass a drug test by lsd shroomer on Jul 16,2008 4:52pm
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toggletoggle post by lsd shroomer at Jul 16,2008 4:52pm
I haven't smoked weed in about 2 or 3 days and I have a drug test tomorrow. I'm also too broke to buy detox. Anyone ever passed one of these when you really shouldn't have?



toggletoggle post by FuckIsMySignature at Jul 16,2008 4:53pm
get someone elses piss



toggletoggle post by josh_hates_you  at Jul 16,2008 5:09pm



toggletoggle post by RichHorror  at Jul 16,2008 5:10pm
And up there. ^



toggletoggle post by powerkok   at Jul 16,2008 5:12pm
2-3 days?
If youre a regular smoker, you are fucked, unless you buy a detox kit.
They come with a piss test so you know if youll pass or not.

If its important that you pass, scrape up 20 bucks asap, because you are not going to magically just pass.



toggletoggle post by lsd shroomer at Jul 16,2008 5:32pm
i hate life



toggletoggle post by lsd shroomer at Jul 16,2008 5:33pm
i don't even know what kind of test it will be



toggletoggle post by FuckIsMySignature at Jul 16,2008 5:35pm
is it for work or the authorities?



toggletoggle post by lsd shroomer at Jul 16,2008 6:17pm
work



toggletoggle post by FuckIsMySignature at Jul 16,2008 6:48pm edited Jul 16,2008 6:49pm
then just get some elses clean urine, store it in a small bottle, and keep it warm with a heating pad. when you get to your test... go in the bathroom and pretend you are pissing but pour that into the sample cup instead. it helps if your bottle makes a squirting sound. works like a charm



toggletoggle post by Mess at Jul 16,2008 8:13pm
i was in the same predicament a couple of weeks ago. poland springs makes a really small bottle. get clean piss (male or female) it doesn't matter and poor it in the bottle. put on some tighty whitey's and jock the bottle.



toggletoggle post by samYam at Jul 16,2008 9:24pm
I have passed numerous drug tests a couple years back while working for a temp agency. The simplest, cheapest way to do this is to drink water, and shitloads of it. You want to drink it so by the time you take the test you've already pissed once or twice. By that time you'll be pissing pretty much straight out water... drink water, fuck goldenseal, the over the counter pass a drug test scam stuff, turn on the tap and drink water. It has not only worked for me but for my wife when she worked on a ship and had to pass USCG drug tests randomly.



toggletoggle post by fuck logging in at Jul 16,2008 9:28pm
I know a kid who knows how to make fake urine, its incredibly easy, but I forgot how he does it.



toggletoggle post by samYam at Jul 16,2008 9:30pm
there's no need to go broke, make your own fake piss, bring someone else's piss, etc... drink water and bring your own clean piss, fresh from the source!



toggletoggle post by archaeon at Jul 16,2008 9:43pm
fuck%20logging%20in said[orig][quote]
I know a kid who knows how to make fake urine, its incredibly easy, but I forgot how he does it.


well that helps



toggletoggle post by IllinoisEnemaBradness at Jul 16,2008 10:36pm
fuck%20logging%20in said[orig][quote]
I know a kid who knows how to make fake urine, its incredibly easy, but I forgot how he does it.


fuck logging in and fuck making a point



toggletoggle post by powerkok   at Jul 16,2008 10:55pm
Water helps, but for an everyday smoker, it wont make you pass, by itself.
If you chance it, and just drink water, DO NOT EAT for at least 12 hours before the test.
If you can hold out for 24 hours, even better.
THC stores in your fat cells among many other places, and if you eat, new fat cells replace the old, thc infested fat cells, which are then expelled through your piss. So if nothing else, try that.
I have had been tested 2x and used the kit, and passed no prob.
The bottle thing.....pff, that may have worked in 1995, but nowadays, there are thermometers built into the cup you are pissing in, if that cup does not read 98.6 +/- .1-2, they will know. Also, they sometimes even stand in there with you while you piss, (although, thats more likely for probation only). That bottle crinkles just once, and youre fucked.

Dont worry about not even knowing what kind of test it is, because if its a hair test, you cant beat it anyway.



toggletoggle post by FuckIsMySignature at Jul 17,2008 12:06am
powerkok said[orig][quote]

The bottle thing.....pff, that may have worked in 1995, but nowadays, there are thermometers built into the cup you are pissing in, if that cup does not read 98.6 +/- .1-2, they will know. Also, they sometimes even stand in there with you while you piss, (although, thats more likely for probation only). That bottle crinkles just once, and youre fucked.
.


I did it 2 years ago. The trick is get one of those one time use heating pads for sports injuries and such. they cost like a 1.29 at cvs. they keep the bottle at the same temperature as your body. just put the bottle against your inner thigh then strap the heating pad over it. you'll be good to go. the only reason i had to do this was because i took the fucking drink and my test showed up as my system being "deluded with water" - so the made take another one the next morning. be aware that you fail a test for that (even by drinking just too much water). Some places are more anal about it than others.



toggletoggle post by samyam at Jul 17,2008 11:53am
I smoked religiously 2-3 a day and passed every test drinking only water.



toggletoggle post by ouchdrummer   at Jul 17,2008 12:01pm
water doesnt work anymore, it comes up dilluted and they make you take it again the next day. If you do that twice, you fail.

Goldenseal doesnt work anymore, EVERY lab piss test also tests for this.

Someone else's piss works... if you can keep it above 80degrees which is hard even in you pants, cause most of the cups you piss into have a thermometor strip on the side that they check RIGHT after you piss. Although they do sell a thing called the urinator, looks like a dick and stores fake piss (you can buy powdered refills) and keeps it warm, although its about 100$ so for your purposes it prolly wont work.

Your only really safe way to do it is to buy one of the proven drinks, i can swear by one that got me out of state paid vacations a couple times, it's called vale, you can by it at Buried Treasures on Haviland st. down by Berkely College. It's 50$ you drink it between 30min and 5 hours before your test, your good. If you dont have the money BORROW IT FROM SOMEONE. cause it's the only legitimate way to be sure.



toggletoggle post by SkinSandwich at Jul 17,2008 12:05pm
Try not doing drugs, but I would not actually recommend it. If you knew that this test was coming up why did you smoke a few days before it?



toggletoggle post by Conservationist  at Jul 17,2008 12:05pm
I keep the bottle in my rectum, which keeps it at exactly 98 degrees.



toggletoggle post by fleshfries at Jul 17,2008 1:21pm
If you don't pass just tell them you eat poppy seed bagels every morning for breakfast, then tell them you would like to reschedule it so you have time to get it out of your system...I'm pretty sure Mythbusters proved it.



toggletoggle post by lsd shroomer at Jul 17,2008 1:27pm
SkinSandwich said[orig][quote]
Try not doing drugs, but I would not actually recommend it. If you knew that this test was coming up why did you smoke a few days before it?


well I didn't know til I had the interview the other day. so I took it this morning. I drank about a gallon of water, pissed 7 times and took some multi vitamins because the b-vitamins make piss yellow. it looked pretty authentic but I don't have the results yet.



toggletoggle post by lsd shroomer at Jul 17,2008 1:29pm
if I have to take it again I'll get some kind of dildo shaped container, tell my dad to piss in it then I'll stick it up my ass.



toggletoggle post by lsd shroomer at Jul 28,2008 7:55pm
I passed. Water and multi vitamins FTW you fags.



toggletoggle post by FuckIsMySignature at Jul 28,2008 7:57pm
good for you



toggletoggle post by samYam at Jul 28,2008 8:29pm
good deal, the water worked...



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