Whether this is really him or not, I don't know but still funny.

-------------------------

YES, I'M A BAD AMERICAN

by: George Carlin


I Am Your Worst Nightmare. I am a BAD American. I am George Carlin.


I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some mid level governmental functionary be it Democratic or Republican!

I'm in touch with my feelings and I like it that way!


I think owning a gun doesn't make you a killer, it makes you a smart American.


I think being a minority does not make you noble or victimized, and does not entitle you to anything.

I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, try to do it in English.


I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God when and where they want to.


My heroes are John Wayne, Babe Ruth, Roy Rogers, and whoever canceled Jerry Springer.

I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor.


I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time watching or arguing about it.


I've never owned a slave, or was a slave, I didn't wander forty years In the desert after getting chased out of Egypt. I haven't burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you! So, shut up already.

I believe if you don't like the way things are here, go back to where you came from and change your own country! This is AMERICA.


I want to know which church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse Jackson practices, where he gets his money, and why he is always part of the problem and not the solution. Can I get an AMEN on that one?



I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry rear if you're running from them..


I also think they have the right to pull you over if you're breaking the law, regardless of what color you are.




And, no, I don't mind having my face shown on my drivers license. I think it's good..... and I'm proud that "God" is written on my money. I think if you are too stupid to know how a ballot works, ! I don't want you deciding who should be running the most powerful nation in the world for the next four years.




I dislike those people standing in the intersections trying to sell me stuff or trying to guilt me into making "donations" to their cause. These people should be targets.



I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes two parents.


And what is going on with gas prices... again?


I believe "illegal" is illegal no matter what the politicians think.


I believe the American flag should be the only one allowed in AMERICA!


If this makes me a BAD American, then yes, I'm a BAD American

It's not, there's were rumors floating around on the interweb a few years ago when this first came out, and he denied it on his webpage

Dissector said:

Whoever wrote this is a BAD impersonator and has probably heard very little of Carlin's performances.
That shit was a bunch of trash; anyone familiar with Carlin's material would be able to tell this is not his work.

Dissector said:

whoah, jerry was cancelled?

"I believe "illegal" is illegal no matter what the politicians think."
what the fuck does that even mean??
and if i understand it at all thats stupid

overall if that is actually carlin i think less of him now

illegal meaning immigrant.

I AM A REAL AMERICAN
FIGHT FOR THE RIGHTS OF EVERYMAN
I AM A REAL AMERICAN FIGHT FOR WHAT'S RIGHT
FIGHT FOR YOUR LIFE!!!!

Ta-Da

http://www.georgecarlin.com/home/bogus.html

Shit piss fuck cunt cocksucker motherfucker and tits........Those are the heavy seven, those are the ones that'll infect your soul, curve your spine and keep the country from winning the waaarrr.....Shit piss fuck cunt cocksucker motherfucker and tits wow.

i'm a pretty bad american.
90% of that is due to sodomy.

Ryan_M said:

That's what made me question if that was him or not. None of that seemed to match up with his other philosophies and political stances. Regardless, I think it's funny whoeever it is.

Right, it's George Carlin style, but only if he were to be bought out by Fox News. This is what made it obvious to me that it wasn't him:

"and I'm proud that 'God' is written on my money"

Anyone who has heard Carlin's awesome rants about the stupidity of an 'old man in the sky' knows that this is not him.

ShadowSD said:

that's exactly what I was thinking too

this was probably written in the clinton administration during the height of the PC movement, most of that shit described would make you a very good american in todays political climate