I'll start:

GODLESS RISING
"Hey brother, my wife writes our lyrics!! NYDM for life!!!"

IPSSISSIMUS
Queer Eye for the Black Metal Guy

COLD NORTHERN VENGEANCE
(they poke enough fun at themselves)

Your mother's cunt smells like carpet cleaner.

i thought this was going to be another graveside service thread.

ASS I STOLE

Composted.

I thought it was going to be a someone from somewhere else int he US making fun of the NE slam bands/scene or the BM scene. looks like the latter

LULZ


More LULZ.

any band from Weymouth

Scarecrow Hill.

Sacreligion!

Shadows smile!! I still need to see this band live.

Wow, you are a total tool. You must feel really good about yourself right now anonodouche.

You took the words right out of my mouth!

Shadows Fall, Killswitch Engage, rinse, repeat. Also a huge helping of Dropkick stupid dumbfuck Murphy's.

sacrelickin

And then you took the words right out of my mouth
Oh-it must have been while you were kissing me
You took the words right out of my mouth
And I swear it's true
I was just about to say I love you

haha

The singer or guitarist, can't remember which, of Ass I Stole is actually a really fucking good painter. Kinda makes me not want to like his work because him and his band were a bunch of prissy bitches.

I don't make fun of bands like Candy Striper Death Orgy. That shit is CHILDISH. Making fun of the elderly. The deluded, senile elderly.

Not cool guys, wtf.

hahahaha, you know whats even funnier is the gum I took from your mouth still has flavor! mmmm big league chew....

lol

Look at the cool kids!

What band is that?

Astyoyle

LOL. With red ties?

Godsmack

There is nothing that isn't hilarious about this picture.

<3 secret admirer <3

All bands that play the same break downs and slams and have three worded names and take names from songs and movies and other crap... I guess they cannot think for themselves!

you just crushed the NY/CT hXc scene with one post, you bastard!

Come on just look at the band names the rev takes pics of.. I feel like a child reading the names and can think of someting stupid to say about just the name! ?of ? The last ? end of ? orchestra ? blue boys ? etc...

you mean blue ballZ

It's like a backyard wrestling stable.

somebody once asked me to join a backyard wrestling league. I thought the idea was retarded at the time, but the more I've thought about it, the funnier I think it could be.

When did it become cool taking a band picture in front of your car. Wait i must be mistaken because it seems like the car is the coolest thing in that picture. It must be a band member or something.......

whats your band name?

I demand the pic with darren looking cool with a cigarette

lol sorry dan they dont seem to that bad boy photo on their page anymore.

No one mentioned 13 Winters yet?

wasnt that the picture of the fat broad up there.

Mastamindz, bitch

And who can forget Wretched Asylum

Report their license plate. Say they pulled a hit and run or drove drunk or something.

I'm gonna have to second whoever said The Shadows Smile.

Click Five
NKOTB
LFO
Aerosmith
Godsmack
Reveille
Vertigod

they all suck.

i heard the dude from boarcorpse reads star wars books.... AND plays D&D!!!???!!???! hahahahahahaha

yeah but does he do it on weeeeeeeeeeeeeed

neo messiah

nnnnnooooooo but...but.... but... dana was in goratory..... so you cant make fun of this band... because someone in the band was in goratory... so he gets a pass

Almost forgot...

WITCH TOMB.
Biggest trend-hopping homos ever.

Very easy to shit-talk when you have no balls. You seem to know who we all are so why don't you come and say hi some day pussy.

Pass denied.

don't get fo real mad about internet silliness mr c.dead. No one cares what anona-duchebags say anyways.... matter of fact, i don't care what anyone says!! Seriously, don't stoop to their level and talk shit, you don't want anyone from the interweb to "come and say hi", maybe they are a transvestite murderer who hasn't had his meth today and is just looking for some metal dudes to rape at gunpoint. I know that's far fetched, but shit like that does happen.

YOU GOAN GIT RAPED

There's a decent amount of shit-talking in this scene.

just ignore this idiot. just another anonyfag.

Ouch, we gotta nerd it up sometime. ON WEED.

ouch's medicinal herbs are some of the greatest in the area

Me = jealous.

sadly Last Rite broke up.

Dig it.

How can everyone forget these bunch of toolbags!

I fucking love this thread!

no, the horror you say

I couldn't resist.

coldbread? what?

fuck u guys talkin trash about my band
this site is a bunch of pansies anyway that wont amount to jack shit.
fucking losers

YOUR BAND NAME WHAT IS IT

never say never

hahaha, fag.

u a fag talkin trash bout my band

You just got called a fag by a dude who spent the past half hour talking about having sex with typefaces. And your band is named after a Brandy album.

Your move Fauntleroy.

Tom,

Why is it that every band you have been in is starting to make this list?

I graduated high school with their keyboardist.

lol wut?

haha thats a good question

I didn't know you went to Fontbonne...

we are gonna be playing nothing but Brandy covers this year

I wish I could laugh at your joke, Janssen. I have no clue what Fontbonne is.

Metal needs more Moesha-worship bands.

brandy's eyes are on different continents

It's a prep school, a prep school for girls.

OH MY GOD SOMEBODY I DONT KNOW MADE FUN O FMY BAND I"M GONNA KILLMYSELF AND EVERYBODY ELSE SUCKS FUCK SHIT WAH WHA

I doubt Die Winters would be admitted to Fontbonne.

I am suprised none of the bands I have been in have made this list yet.

I feel so left out!!!!

dont worry mc your band sucks too. its a big giant suckfest.

HUZZAH!

That's not good enough. I need a band image or band pic posted with a bash.

Quit half assing it.

Seen bands suck before, etc. wiener kids blah blah blah.

That's not good enough. I need a band image or band pic posted with a bash.

Quit half assing it.

<img src="Your faggy band">

LOL@homos.

Close enough.

FIGHT PIZZA OR YOU AREN'T HARDCORE

I felt similar, so i made fun of my own band for having such a geeky fucker in it. ME!!

LULZ.

I haven't even played out with new band yet. I officially joined them and haven't been updated on the band page yet.

Guess I'll eat PIZZA in the mean time.

those guys look like seriously dorky dudes. They're probably all really nice.

LOL

True story, I used to work with the brother of the guy on the right with the beard and glasses. He couldn't stop talking about how awesome they were and gave me the CD. Nice guy but..............EHHHH.
Pretty much a really bad SOD wannabe.

Also, I'll throw one out for POWABOMB!
SEAN! CAN YOU FEEELLLLLL IIIITTTTTTTTT!!!!?

BRINGIN' BACK, BUCK BUCK BUCK.

this thread has taught me three things:

1) Asystole is WICKED gay.
2) The title really means "say your band name"
3) Sac is the only metal band with an original-ish logo.

Holy shit, I remember those guys. That was way back.

"ANAL. VAPOR. WAS IT GASSES, OR DO YOU NEED PAPER!?"

hahahaa

aaaahahahaha

god neo messiah was terrible.
their lead singer (Rory) was actually a nice dude though.
i used to work with him in a convienience store in mansfield, we used to steal the free packs of smokes out of the little buy one get one free boxes and make fun of customers.

haha....i actually like Abortion Clinic.
not very original (like s.o.d. meets the mentors, but wayyy less talented than either band.) but kinda heavy, and funny as hell.

I was just throwing the ol' Sacreligion logo up there just for humor.

do you guys still have that kid john in the band?
the guy who used to play with the sound effects on a casio keyboard and jump around on stage like a drunk monkey.

he was actually how i first heard sacreligion.
my old roommate was his girlfriend, and when i first met him, he had heard i was into metal and gave me a demo disc.

he's a nice kid, but i hated when his unemployed ass would come over and scrounge all my beer, smokes and mountain dew.

Beer first. Then smokes.

pretty much.
"hey dude, can i grab one of those beers"
"hey orgy, ya got a smoke?"
"oh man, that beer and nicotine dried my mouth out, can i have some of that mountain dew?"

HA! oh man, yeah John is still our "keyboard" player. he has made a complete turnaround in his life. he got his shit together, works for the state of Rhode Island and cleaned up his act. he still flails around on stage like a retarded drunk monkey. actually he had to change his flailing style because his old one was separating the discs in his spine.

jonny sac is my hero

that's good to hear.
i always thought he was a real good guy, dude just needed to get his shit together.

Doesn't that describe most of Sacreligion?

J/K

i'll leave that one alone.

I was just kidding. No bashing.

we just need to get everyone to practice. ian's good at doing other stuff.

hey that is a good thing !!

my favorite band to make fun of is blue. he's a band now, right?

LITCH KING and their tinty guitar sound

they are from litchfield.

OP: jealous of my flaxen hair and incomparable fashion sense

I can't believe after reading through this whole that no one mentioned Saint To Sinner

Did this thread pre-date the Bovacaust?

Looks like it.

That band BORGABOR V sucked fucking ass

I actually just said "borgaborgaborgaborgaborgabor" to myself and it made me smile.

i luled at abortion clinic.

one of raising kubrick's first shows in late 2001/early 2002 was with these guys. breathtaking.

Two dead sluts one good fuck. The lead literally penetrated his fecal exit with his mic and smeared something maloderous all over himself

bimp

Wait, some dude's real name is Orgy?

^^ troof

I'm so shocked! We've been made fun of over and over again and haven't made promotions for this thread yet! All Hail the Mighty Zircon OV War! We are indeed the greatest and best band to have ever existed let alone the most powerful black metal band of NE!! Easy!

that pretty much sums up the majority of bands on this board

The Shitty Beetles can get fucked

bennyhillifier

Can't wait for 3 down 1 to go!

Weak. They are an awesome band and I've heard it's actually only the guitarist who is gay and the rest are straight.

T.I.

<3

^ lollerz

I'm utterly astounded that Seax has not been mentioned in this thread!

Still dont get why anyone would wanna troll Thundersteel. Talk to the dude for 5 minutes. You'll get where he is coming from, and would most likely quit the hating. Good dude, just different then most of the underground metalheads. Its almost like happy thrash/power metal are a totally different scence anyhow

*scene

THUNDERSTEEL DETECTED

He is just a nice kid. He's overcome alot of shit. If you meet him, you get why he posts like an 80's pizza thrasher. I honestly hate that happy shit, but whatever, each to his own.

Nobody cares if he's a nice kid. Just that he fucks off.

Goatcatalyst is a loser

We are the biggest joke NE has ever encountered now because of ton to and the Lone Danger constantly replacing band members.

I still think Thundersteel is an asshole.

you called?

Yeah. I want you to tie Thundersteel up, douse him in gasoline, and throw his stupid, spandex wearing ass IN a dumpster fire so that stupid faggot burns to death.