"don't fool with the babysitter" - adventures in babysitting the ABC tv edit

"Caw Caw...BANG...Fuck, I'm dead" - That dude with the cool voice in the Crow.

"goooooo, ruuuuuun, get to da choppaaaah!" - arnold, predator
"you're one ugly motherfucker" - arnold, predator
"get away from her you bitch!" - sigourney, aliens
"where you going, NO WHERE" - bob marley, boondock saints
"let me tell you somethin!!!" - jim carrey, snl
"come on cleetus, come on, come on cleetus!" - eddie murphy, nutty prof.
"THREE BOOBED WOMAN , black dood: Baby, you make me wish I had three hands." - total recall
"wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world? eeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" jim carrey, dumb & dumber
"What's the matter? The CIA got you pushing too many pencils? " - arnold, predator
"Bunch of slack-jawed faggots around here! This stuff will make you a god damnned sexual Tyrannosaurus, just like me! " - blaine, predator
"After Arnold has nailed a guy to the wall with his knife, Arnold: Stick around. " - arnold, predator
"You're ghostin' us, motherfucker. I don't care who you are back in the world, you give away our position one more time, I'll bleed ya, real quiet. Leave ya here. Got that? " mac, predator

"Stick around "- arnold in the predator
"youuu sonn uva bitch" - arnold in the predator
"was a matta dillon CIA got you pushing to many pencils down at the office" -arnold in the predator
" DOOO IT KILLL MEEE DOOO IT NOW!!! " - arnold in the predator
" consider dat a divorce" - arnold in total recall
" your a choir boy compared to me A FAWKING CHOIR BOY!! " - arnold in end of days
" Your chariort is very nice but were are da horses? " - Arnold in Hercules in New York
" Its not a dawg itsa ferret" - arnold in kindergarden cop
" AND STOP SHOUTING IM NOT DEF" - arnold in The last action hero
" Sully..... remeber when I said id kill you last" ... " yeah matrix thats right you, you said you'd kill me last".......... " I LIEEEEEEDDDDD " - arnold and some faggot in Commando
" Its TURBO TIME" - Arnold in Jingle all the way
and finally

"BWAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!" arnold in Conan the barbarian

note: I have to see Hercules in New York

Paul at school said:

That's probably the most classic Arnold line ever!

the predator soundtrack, best soundtrack ever.

"bickfords"- Ross McHue

"Maybe you'd feel better after we had some dirty sex!" - Norm McDonald (Dirty Work)
"Aaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!" - that kid [with the long name I don't want to spell] (Home Alone)
"Fuck you motherfucker!!!!" - Joe Pesci (every Joe Pesci movie)

"No man, no Billy Bong Thornton, not without Kenny, it wouldnt be right... get Wesley Pipes" Jim Breuer - Half Baked
Kenny: "Hey girl, ya hungry?" Random Black Woman "Fuck you nigga!" -Half Baked
"Fuck you, Fuck you, Fuck you, Fuck you, you coo, Fuck you I'm out" Guillame Diaz - Half Baked
"I.E E.G. Fuck you" Dennis Farina - Get Shorty
"They say the fuckin smog is the fuckin reason we got such beautiful fuckin sunsets" Dennis Farina - Get Shorty
Valentin: "Do you know how cold the winter is in Russia? Tell 'im Demitri!" offscreen voice: "well, it depe-" Valentin: "SILENCE!" -Goldeneye
"I shot him six times! I shot him six times! He is not human! I shot him six times!" Donald Pleasance - Halloween II (note: all three occurences of the phrase "I shot him six times!" are said in the same tone of voice)

Paul at school said:

Best Arnold quote ever.

"I'm telling you Ray, these people are Satanists, as I sit here they are satanists. Look the world if full of these kind of things, black masses, mutilations, MUTILATIONS, the incubus, the succubus. I'm telling you, Walter was a human sacrifice."-Art, The Burbs

"Listen to your wife, who listens to their wife. Listen, you gotta listen to me. We gotta go down the religuos supply store. We gotta get ourselves a couple gallons of holy water. My cousin Jerrys a priest. He can get us a deal. Then we gotta go to the market. We gotta get big strings of garlic. We gotta gget fresh lambs blood. Ray, do want them to take your family, kidnap em, tear there livers out and make some satanic pate? Ray, you're chanting. Ray, look, unconscious chanting. You're chanting. I want to kill everyone, Satan is good, Satan is my pal. Once they get in here, its over pal."-Art, The Burbs

"Remember this: a one-night stand may be over in the morning, but syphilis lasts a lifetime."
--Men of Honor, (Robert Dinero)


"I don't need you to tell me how fuckin' good my coffee is, ok? I'm the one who buys it. I know how good it is. When Bonnie goes shopping, she buys shit. I buy the gourmet expensive stuff 'cause when I drink it, I wanna taste it. But you know what's on my mind right now? It ain't the coffee in my kitchen. It's the dead nigger in my gararge."
--Pulp Fiction


and some non movie quotes:

"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, 'It's better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver.'"
--Jack Handy


"What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is."
--Dan Quayle

"No one said being a parent was going to be easy, but it is. Just have sex and leave town."
--Max Weinberg (The More You Know)

"hola mama sita"
-- Ross 'n' Roll.

Song, not a movie, but seriously fucked. Think twice when you hear "empowered" women singing this in a karaoke bar.


RESPECT

What you want, baby I got.
What you need, do you know I got it?
All I'm askin' is for a little respect when you come home. Just a little bit.

I ain't gonna do you wrong while you're gone.
Ain't gonna do you wrong 'cause I don't wanna.
All I'm askin' is for a little respect when you come home.

I'm about to give you all of my money,
And all I'm askin' in return , honey
Is to give me my profits when you get home.

Ooo, your kisses, sweeter than honey.
And guess what? So is my money.
All I want you to do for me
Is give it to me when you get home.
Yeah baby, whip it to me
When you get home, now.

Oh sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me,
A little respect, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me.
Whoa baby, a little respect.
I get tired, keep on tryin', You're runnin' out of foolin'
And I ain't lyin'.
Respect, when you come home,
Or you might walk in and find out I'm gone
I got to have a little respect.

"Hey baby, you ever had your asshole licked by a fat man in an overcoat?" - Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back

heh, respect is funny.

Eddie murphy pretending to be his drunk dad: "What we want, baby you got it, what we need, you know I got it, all im askin'. is for a little respect mothafucka! when I come on' home, R-E-C-C-T-T-P, motherfucker you know how to spell it" - eddie murphy, raw

:its not a tumah.... its not a tumah at all!" arnold in Kindergarten Cop

store owner in Falling Down - "...and what the hell is this doing in here..? FAGGOT SHIT!"

but on non-cable, they change it to... "...what the hell is this doing in here..? FAIRY STUFF!"

haha.

pretty much anything out of Pulp Fiction.

NEXT TIME I COME FOR YOU
IM GONNA WANT SOME COCKTAIL...

FRUIT !

heartless said:

haha so i am not the only one doing half baked quotes. anyway here is one my personal faves:

"Jedi Mind Trick! Mothafuckin Yoda 'n' shit!" Jason Mewes - Mallrats

best edit ever: Die Hard 2

yippy kay yay motherfucker...

translated on NBC:

yippy kay yay you turkeys

final destination 2:
"what are you thinking!?"
"...im thinking you should suck on my junk biATCH!"

retzam said:



"I'd do it myself, but I threw my back out humpin your mom last night."

Jason Mewes.... classic

Terence said:

Another chanel did, "Yippy kay yay Mr. Falcon."

"This is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass!"-Walter, Big Lebowski
T.V. version
"This is what happens when you find a stranger in the Alps!"-Walter, Big Lebowski

Obviously this is no contender for the NBC editing of Die Hard 2, but it is classic anyway.

Happy Gilmore "Where were you on that one dipshit"

FOX Editing "Where were you on that one dummy"

*helicopter noise* - michael winslow Police Academy 1-512

Best TV edit ever is from the Big Lewboski or however you spell it

" THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU FUCK A STRANGER IN THE ASS"

translate

" THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU FIND A STRANGER IN THE ALPS"

i wanna talk to sampson
fly me to the moon like that bitch peter frampton
cause its hard being black and gifted
sometimes i just wanna thow it all down and get lifted
-half baked

Alice Kramden not Peter Frampton, great song though.

I'm impotant man! Get away from me biatch!

DeOdiumMortis said:

you are correct sir

my doctor says i need a backiotomy

and


HE HAD SEX WITH MY MOMMA

I want candy, bubble gum or taffy
Skip to the sweet shop with my sweetheart Sandy
Got my pennies saved so I'm a sugar daddy
I'm her Hume Cronyn, she's my Jessica Tandy, I want candy!

Gonna get ya ass kicked
Nasty
Do it to your daddy, embarass your whole family
Just because you came between a kid and his candy
I need candy
Any kind'll do
Don't care if it's nutritious or "FDA approved"
It's gonna make me spaz like bobcats on booze
A hyperactive juice that only I can produce
And build a giant drill
Bore straight into hell
Releasin' ancient demons from a sleep forever spell
So they can walk upon the earth
And get resituated
And hawk the diet pills that MC Pee Pants has created

Mess up the mix, mix up the mess
Come on down yo, here's the address
It's six, one-two Wharf Avenue
Six, one-two Wharf Avenue

where's ross from IDN when there's a movie quote thread?!

hey ma, how bout some cookies?

no dice

this ain't ova

DeOdiumMortis said:






MC PEE PANTS!!!


yes.

you wanted branson, this is brawnson

xboobiesx said:


We are the Mooninites from the inner core of the moon....our race is hundreds of years beyond yours....Some would say that the Earth is our moon...but that would belittle the name of our Moon...which is the moon.



Xnothing-can-defeat-the-quad-lazerX

xmikex said:

what movie is that from?

aqua team hunger force. best show ever

George said:

oh ok, havnt seen that episode. yea aqua team hunger force is fuckin great. but I think the title "best show ever" is a tie between that and home movies.

xmikex said:



the moonites are the shit..


"on the moon... nerds get their pants pulled down and they are spanked with moon rocks.

The pinnacle of ATHF was the Foreigner belt episode. They've yet to top that one.

M-"But that's where Carl keeps all his clothes."
I-"These women don't have clothes and they're not complaining."
E-"Yeah, they're kissing each other!"
I-"And you want Carl to be forever kissed, don't you?"

LET JESUS FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!

Ok, here's another:

Trick or Treat, Muthafucka! -Busta Rhymes, Halloween Resurrection

Counselor-Welcome back everybody
Counselor-Nate it's good to see you back
Counselor-People we have a new member today
Counselor-I'd like you to meet him
Counselor-He's gonna stand up and tell us
Counselor-What's going on with him and
Counselor-What he wants to change about himself
Counselor-If you will
Violent J-Ummm hello everybody
Violent J-My name is Violent J
Violent J-And i'm an axe murderer
Group In Background-Hi Violent J
---Later In the Song---
Violent J-I think, well i hope it's like
Violent J-All bigots and richies that i'm killing but
Violent J-Probably an occasional innocent bystander every now and then
Counselor-That's ok we all make mistakes
Counselor-But are you absoutely sure that
Counselor-It's even you doing these killings?

ohh and i like it anally

This rules!!!
"You son of a bitch!" -Arnold : Predator
"GET DOWN!!!" -Arnold : Just about every movie that he's in

"Yeah I know GWAR, I'm their fucking manager!" -Sleazy P. Martini :any GWAR movie

"I'm sorry Ray, I'm terrified beyond the ability of rational thought."
-Ghostbusters 1- (that might be a little wrong, but its one of the funniest movies ever, trust me, watch it again)

"You like that burger!" -Showgirls-

"It smells like sex in here." -SuperTroopers-

"Today, today, today!.. The most advanced amusment park in the entire world." -John hammond : Jurassic park

Great thread to bump!

"They say the fuckin smog's the fuckin reason we have such beautiful fuckin sunsets." - Ray Barboni, Get Shorty

"This way hobbitses, there's ways to go yet!" Gollum, LotR Two Towers

"You kids are all the same with your long hair and faggot clothes" Some dude in Let Sleeping Corpses Lie

"Without any real form of autopsy, I'm gonna have to say cause of death is this corkscrew in her ear..ew thats nasty" Fat guy from Bloodfeast 2

"Hey! Try not to suck any dick on your way through the parking lot..."
-Dante Hicks, Clerks

"How about i punch-a-size your face for free?"
-Farva, Super Troopers

"Your Mouth Will Make An Interesting Urinal" Bloodsucking Freaks

the only thing in my head is stuff
from boondock saints. i have to hear
my friend constantly recite lines from
that movie.