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: post by Christian Weston Chandler at 2014-12-16 15:53:43
I, Christian Weston Chandler, have been currently experiencing my own Lonesome and Sad Depression. This is due to the following conditions:

I am a Frustrated Virgin
I need a pretty 18-(my current age)-year old, Boyfriend-Free Girl.
I am very shy in approaching the girls, for I FEAR that they are all already paired up with some JERK (a MAN, other than myself, CWC, and my father, Robert Franklin Chandler, Jr.), which I've dubbed the fear, Noviophobia, after the Spanish word for "Boyfriend."
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