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:	post by RichHorror at 2007-01-22 19:16:15

I've had two. One was some married broad from New Hampshire. Kinda lumpy with a too-freckle filled face. I honestly fucked her just because she was married and hoped it would get back to her husband and that her husband would beat her.

The second was some girl I met off myspace. She had no pictures up, which should've been a HUGE red flag but I was retarded. I picked her up and almost sped away when I saw how tubby she was. She had a weird face too. So, we get to my house and at the time the only TV was in the bedroom. I lay on the bed and she sits there as Dodgeball plays... and I realize there's no way in fuck I want to spend the duration of an entire movie with this fucking hosebag. So I start playing pocket pool, and when I'm halfway to cumming I hop on her. I think I got two thrusts total before I pulled out and blew a load all over her stupid weird-looking face. I get up, wipe the cum off my dick with a hand towel and throw it at her head so she can clean up. I then put my pants back on and tell her I had to work early in the morning and should get her back home. This was funny because she knew I didn't have a job. So I drive her home, and as I pull in front of her house my bassist calls me on my cell. So I answer it and exclaim 'Guess what? I just nailed some fat bitch off of MySpace!' as she was getting out of my car. Then I flipped her off and drove away.

Oh yeah, and as we were leaving my house I looked at a clock. She was in my house a grand total of eleven minutes. Awesome.

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